I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize