I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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