These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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