69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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