this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
