We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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