There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
