bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
