Your tits are I can't wait for
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
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