Midget sex pt 2 tonight
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
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