About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....