I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
