so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed