Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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