The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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