Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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