and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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