There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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