After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
