You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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