my sisters under your porch take her home
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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