The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
