Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
