Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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