her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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