Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
