I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
