the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Randomize
