I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
