I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize