we have pet lesbian snakes
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Randomize
