I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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