Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
