Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
