Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
two words: eviction party
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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