Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
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