her vagine was all disorganized.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
is wine microwaveable?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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