worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Of course I have a pirate flag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
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