Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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