I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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