there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Randomize
