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She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
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