We won't sleep together?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Dignity is for republicans.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Randomize
