It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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