I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize