You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
