i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I would ride that face into the sunset
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