East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
