and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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