Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
