She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
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What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
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you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize