well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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